Vacuuming the Plants

First things first, not done with the treatments yet! Friday, July 10 should be the day. Since Kevin wrote the previous entry, I had to take a couple of extra days off to help settle down swelling. As you know, that didn't work. And I've been a hot, steroid mess since then.

Last Sunday and Monday were great. I got lots of stuff done. By Tuesday (one week ago today), things were going downhill fast. By Wednesday, after a nightmare, surreal trippy ride to Bloomington with 3 - yes, 3, of my family members, I was a basket case. Too much conversation. Too much stress. Too much stimulation. Too much pre 4th of July traffic.

After showing up at MPRI that day at my wits end, I was tapered down from the Decadron a notch. And we were given strict instructions for the rest of my visits - 1 patient, 1 driver. That's it.

That taper went well for about a day, until I got into the cleaning frenzy mode over the holiday weekend. And anxiety. And more anxiety. I was washing windows inside and out, cleaning out crevices with with the handheld vacuum. Cleaning behind the dusty TV. I was even giving the plants a vacuuming! As Kevin said, "you are exhausting me". (Poor Kevin, if only I was this clean all the time!)

So, I went to MPRI yesterday waving the white flag, big time!! Went down again on the 'roids and have something that might help calm me down. It hasn't so far, but with the extra drop with the 'roid dosage, I should be a little more even keeled...maybe...hopefully??

I should be happy for this week, but I just want to get out of there with at least a shred of dignity....or at least no more teardrops when they put that damn mask over my face. It's just frustrating to get this far, and then to crumble at the end all because of some stupid little pill.

I am determined to go out right for the last 4 treatments...with a smile on my face. Cause that's how it SHOULD BE!!!!!!

Check back in the next couple of days. As I start to realize how close I am to being done, I'm going to be in a much better - and funnier - place. After all, it's not like a have a huge tumor in my head anymore! I mean geez, Jen, get a grip!!!

I hope that everyone had a fabulous 4th of July!!